Power of choice -part 1So y’all how’s it been? The last time I spoke to you about MSDhoni, Aarohi, penumbral leadership, and all. So let me keep this post less cerebral and more emotional. Ironically, I’m gonna be sharing about my journey of becomingmorecerebral andlessemotional. Ha. That’s clearly confusing for a start, y’all. Just stick with me and you’ll besortedin a few paragraphs. So I’ve feltstuckin my parenting on many occasions.Dead-as-a-dodoends. “Mom, can I play Roblox?” “Mom, can we order pizza?” These questions are uttered innocently, sitting slouched, with the tech-neck well on its way. But, to me, these questions are loaded triggers that set me into a spin. It is sacrilege y’all. These are questions that dare not be uttered in my courts of (f)law and order.
When they are uttered, mygavel thundersin a non-negotiable judgment, “No more Roblox! No pizza! And all objections overruled!”But then, I am also anawesomeaunt, a damn-good tutor (they say), and a facilitator of sorts, to other kids. I’m saccharine-sweet, always listening, child-centric, whatnot.Out of the corner of my eye, I see my own kids’simmering brothof emotions: they are perhaps angry, jealous, and wistful wishing that their mom could be half as nice as the aunt Nitya or Nitya Ma’am that other kids experience.(To be contd.)Power of choice -part 2
Stuckin my parenting crisis, I dragged myself to a facilitation meeting at Aarohi-x. I avoid these meetings for two reasons. They are a bit too authentic. And while I’m there, I start to give up my slave lord powers. But I always come back lighter, wiser, and more loving. Chalo, It’s a love-hate relationship.In one such meeting, Aditi sowed a seed of thought, “Why can’t we be a facilitator, and not a mom, to our children?” (Paraphrased)Sacrilege!I do a bit of sociocracy and all with my family, y’all. We are a pretty democratic family because I say so. Ha. But this was too much! To relook my role, not as a momma but as a facilitator…”(How) Can I still love my children if I turn into their facilitator?” I asked weakly. “Of course we can love our child!Facilitation is adifferentkind of love,” (paraphrased) Aditi responded with a child-like laugh. That seed right there changed my relationship status to “Unstuck” with my kids.When we now approach gavel-thundering topics, I resign from being an egotistical, emotional mom, who mollycoddles and micromanages their kids.I put on my brilliant facilitator hat and get down to adulting business. I give respect and take respect. I speak and I listen. I let go and what’s important stays important. I think I can safely say my gavel has fallen into disuse. Then again, check with my kids if you want to know the ground reality.”You want more roblox time? Let’s keep a mood diary. What are you like on roblox-high days? And on R-low days?” “You want pizza?Let’s talk,baby!”Aha! Guess who’s in charge now? Everyone! Like it should be.