Understanding Gender and Sexuality

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We began with the question – What is a girl, what is a boy? What is the difference between them?
Some responses were : Different energy levels, different Voice, choices, body parts, way of thinking, likes, clothes etc.Pink is for girls and blue for boys. Boy don’t hit a girls.

For boys – Muscular, Stronger, Cool, Adventure, Darby, Courageous
For Girls – Beautiful, Sensitive, Caring, Understanding, Polite, Listener

Which gender comes to your mind when you think of these profession?
Doctor, Body Guard, Farmer,Nurse, House helper.

How are we conditioned to be a boy or a girl since childhood?
Toys, TV shows, Gifts
How are we created this difference in our environment? Teasing and commenting : Why you play with girls?Why crying like a girl? Oh! Lifting heavy things is work for boys.

We saw an recent advertisement of “fair and handsome” to see how media is also influencing our understanding of Gender.

What will happen if we start thinking that
“The only difference between a boy and a girl is their reproductive and sexual organs”.Otherwise each individual is UNIQUE and we all think and behave differently with different choices.

Initially there was a unison of agreement to this statement, but then was asked to pause and think if really this is true for me, Do I think and then act as both genders are equal?

Is Male and Female the only genders ? Let’s understand other genders.
To understand what are the other genders we need to understand the definition of 3 terms.

Sex – I am sex of girl or boy. That means biological and physical construction of the body
Gender – Which gender role do I identify with? When one says I am a gender of a girl, means I identify with the social and cultural construct of a girl.
Sexuality – Which gender one feels sexually attracted to.

Most of us have all three as same, so my sex, gender and sexuality is of a male or female, however there are different people in this world.

  • LESBIAN – Gender and Sex of female, with sexuality of same gender (girl).
  • GAY – Gender and Sex of male, with sexuality of same gender (boy).
  • BISEXUAL- Feel attracted to both the genders ( opposite and same)
  • TRANSGENDER – Sex of male but feel like the gender of female or vice-versa.
  • QUEER – Umbrella term for all other gender (LGBTQIA+)
  • QUESTIONING – a term for someone are in state of questioning their gender identity or sexuality.
  • INTERSEX – Sex is neither male or female – born with mixed internal and external reproductive organs.
  • ALLY -some one who supports all the gender and sexuality.
  • ASEXUAL – Asexual have no sexual desire and dont feel attraction to any gender.
  • + Stands for
  • PAN SEXUAL – attracted to all genders – male, female, transgender and intersex.
  • DEMISEXUAL – attracted only after emotional bond is established with the person
  • TWO SPIRIT- identifies with both female and male gender, feels two spirited.

All of us are different and have our own journey of understanding our gender and sexuality.The spectrum is so wide, that it’s difficult to say you are only a boy and only a girl.

There are many possibilities. All this is possible and there is nothing wrong with it. All genders should be respected for whom they are.

After understanding the different genders, people were left with questions, curiosity and understanding. Also with the question, Are we really creating a world of equality for all genders? Are we are still stuck with our conditioning on gender?

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