Good Opinion


Some of us, in some corner of our heart, some desire to see our kids famous, happy and successful… To fulfill our desire we also carefully expose our kids to many such people, create opportunities to get exposed to such skills beyond schooling.

One of the thing we miss is to understand what makes these people different from most of us. They see the same sunset we see, they breathe the same air what we breathe but there is something which separates them from us.

FIRST – “Independent of good opinion of others” – Often we and kids too look for “appreciation” – How is this? How well I did? How am I looking?….Often this is also expressed as “natural” and a medium to “motivate”. We continue to use appreciation as a mean to motivate them and we continue to make them dependent on others opinion :). Fear of disapproval makes our children dependent on other’s opinion.This reminds me a quote from “counsels of Bahaudin” –If a teacher encourages you, he is not trying to attach you to him. He is trying, rather, to show you how easily you can be attracted. If he discourages you, the lesson is that you are at the mercy of discouragement”

SECOND, Detach from outcome – Before we start with a task, we may have an end result in our mind and drive for that end result – study well to get good grades, work hard to be successful…be good to stay good and so on. While kids also achieve what we begin with, they becomes dependent on “outcome” . “If I cannot see the results, I lose interest. For me to be motivated I need to see some outcome”. Well what happens when you see no tangible results? Can our kids stay with a purpose without any outcome? Can our kids paint just for love of painting not to win a painting competition or sing for love singing not to perform on the stage?

And THIRD, Life on being “on purpose” – Do our kids do what their heart tell them? or they do what their future needs from them?

Lets ponder over … watch video – talk by Wayne Dyer on “How To Get What You Really Want”,