Teen club - romantic relationships

What is a romantic relationship ?

Our image of love, romantic relationships and dating is heavily loaded by external influences. Media, movies, songs, advertisements, society, parents and friends all play a role in shaping our understanding of relationships.

This teen club we tried to look at how all are we looking at relationships. Below is a overview of the conversations that took place in teen club.

If a girl and boy like each other in the community, rumors and gossip flies. If a girl and boy sit next to each other in session smiles and giggles are exchanged. Who likes who is the question to ask each other and giggle about it.

Gossiping about relationships  has been going on for 50 years among teenagers and youth, we saw this in the  song “Tum ko pata hai ” from an old movie. Are we modern if we still continue to look at love through one lense and not question ourselves?

Sun setting, romantic music playing, wind blowing and something magical happening is Love.
Someone who will solve all your problems, someone who you can put your burden on, is a romantic partner.
Going out to eat food, sitting in a cafe, going out for movies is dating.

Gossiping and talking about stuff with each other is what happens on dates.

Kissing, holding hands, resting head on shoulder is what happens in a romantic relationship.

Selfies, dates, giving flowers, gifts, love letters, saying corny lines, flirting, dressing up for each other is what a happens in a romantic relationship.

These are all some definitions that we have received from external influences but what are the other aspects of a relationships? How else can we look at relationship. What is a healthy relationship? How can a relationship help me grown and be meaningful for me and the other?

Some choices that are there in a relationship is supporting each other in each others goals, dreams and interest. Questioning, pushing and motivating each other to move ahead in our goals. Listening and sharing our emotions, thoughts, struggles and challenges. Doing something interesting together can also be called be a date. Going for a trek, for a learning trip or doing something to build upon our interest can also be a date.

Communication, respect, support, trust, acceptance can be some aspects of a healthy relationship. A healthy relationship is also where we can be who we are, no need to put a mask on, no need to dress up in a certain way or act in a certain way to keep the partner interested.

In movies holding hands is shown with dramatic music and slow motion, but in reality what happens? Are we making a big thing out of physical intimacy. Physical intimacy is a part of romantic relationship but are we doing it with understanding?

What is the role do I play towards my parents, friends and society in this? What responsibility do I have when I live in a community of mix cultures and ages? Is it okay to hold hands in a public space? Is it okay to talk about crushes with a small child around? What is our understanding?

Lots of thoughts, confusion and understanding around romantic relationships.